can anyone give me the command line and switches for itunes?

It uses Installshield. I think it was actually the first installshield app I managed to actually get to install silently. Anyway, instructions are available on this site and probably numerous times in the forum.

I tried the way it said on the website with the -R switch and no setup.iss file was in the windows dir
am i doing it wrong?

As with most Installshield apps, it may need to be extracted first.

any ideas on how to extract it, i tried changing extension and using winrar